2026 rink desk emergency edition

GWEC

Greasy Wombats Epic Championship

Technical thrillers, fake sponsors, basement glory, and stat crimes filed before breakfast.

7 rink fights
Oct 7, 2025
The Rink desk is open
The rink feed is alive
ESPN opened the side door. The scores are breathing.
Rink desk filedJun 15, 12:13 PM
Current sheetWeek 1
Current edition
Season & Week Archive2026 / Week 1
Oct 7, 2025
Change
Old rink nights21 on file
Opening ceremony adjournedThe rink desk takes the wheel
Oct 7, 2025

7 rink fights / Oct 7, 2025 / fantasy points, allegedly

The Board

razorLive gap 0 pts
NOX leads
Noxen Inbreds
#- NOX
0
Pvckin' Pranksters
#- PCKN
0
razorLive gap 0 pts
WBb leads
Walnutport Breadbois
#- WBb
0
Lehigh Brazil Nuts
#- LBN
0
razorLive gap 0 pts
TPM leads
Trash Panda’s Mischief
#- TPM
0
Away TBD
#- AWAY
0
razorLive gap 0 pts
SHIC leads
Shickshinny Stickticklers
#- SHIC
0
Hanover Hung Henchmen
#- HHH
0
razorLive gap 0 pts
TSBD leads
Taylor Swift Backup Dancers
#- TSBD
0
Dover Dipsy Doodles
#- DDD
0
razorLive gap 0 pts
TM13 leads
Team 13
#- TM13
0
Hunlocks Most Wanted
#- HMW
0
razorLive gap 0 pts
DD leads
Dillsburg Dermits
#- DD
0
Dover Defenestrate
#- DDEF
0

Presented with suspicious confidence

From The Rink Desk

Noxen Inbreds is making noise on the top shelf while 7 matchups remain within five points. The paperwork desk has 0 moves on the clipboard.

Week 1 rink report

Noxen Inbreds and Pvckin' Pranksters are the current stress test, separated by 0 points.

Top shelf note

Noxen Inbreds is perched on the top shelf at 0-0-0.

Paperwork desk

The fax machine is quiet. Too quiet.

3 issues filed under suspicious journalism

The Rink Archive

Now on the coffee-stained lectern

The Rink, 2025 - Issue 1

2025 / Issue 1Mar 5, 20251.2 MB

The debut Rink brings Breadbois paper-mache fumes, Rico the Trash Panada mascot eating Longhorn, Dermits dynasty panic, the Stickticklers skipper stair incident, Hunlocks facility medical horror, a Puckin Pranksters heater, and the original cry for an editor.

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2025 / Issue 1

The Rink, 2025 - Issue 1

The debut Rink brings Breadbois paper-mache fumes, Rico the Trash Panada mascot eating Longhorn, Dermits dynasty panic, the Stickticklers skipper stair incident, Hunlocks facility medical horror, a Puckin Pranksters heater, and the original cry for an editor.

ReadPDF
2026 / Issue 2

The Rink, 2026 - Issue 2

BIG NUT arrives as GWEC's Silk Almond Milk sponsor before the issue swerves into an FAA raid at HQ, Stacieah and the Greasy Wombats saving New Year's Eve, John Cleese cave confusion, cordinum ice cave dwellers, Rebekah Lewis' butter-snatching arrest, and Week 16 standings.

ReadPDF
2026 / Issue 3

The Rink, 2026 - Issue 3

Gary "The Goalpost" Johnson takes over as editor, explains his mostly-reading platform, and immediately covers Glizz Blankenship's writer strike, open-flame wax melter grievances, the Butter Snatching Bandit sequel, the butter cow uprising, Week 20.5 standings, and one exhausted plea for Glizz to come home.

ReadPDF
Commissioner upload desk
PDFs in, basement lore out
Open
How the slot works: choose a PDF, stamp it with the commissioner code, and the issue joins the rack after the basement door approves it.
Issue paperwork
Rack coordinates

ESPN recent transactions / refreshed on page load

Front Office Shenanigans

Pulled Jun 15, 12:13 PM. ESPN did not hand back recent roster funny business, so the fax machine is filing a quiet little system note.
1m ago
Jun 15, 12:13 PM
rink desk

The Rink desk pulled the ESPN sheet. No recent roster funny business came through the fax.